comes from an awareness. If we really want to put xyz values of humanity into practice, the main question is: What stories do I choose to give attention and feed daily?

The background of the website content has its origin in practice, experience, and self-awareness in action. I have translated this into cornerstones and directions for developing personal leadership for embodied living.

The guiding principles of the content on this site find common ground with principles such as those of the Circle of Influence (by Stephen Covey), Theory U (by Otto Scharmer), the power of now and presencing, Ken Wilber’s integral theory, systemic constellation work, and the cognitive model which states that thoughts, feelings, and behavior (patterns) are interrelated.

Gone by Mist

Raised in a sectarian environment and being a third-generation Holocaust survivor, I found myself struggling with several survival mechanisms early on in life.

Once I noticed that I was actually getting in my own way, I began to realize that I myself was the key to changing my patterns. I could make the choice to step out of the rat race of my patterns and out of the mist of stress and cloudiness they were causing.

I began to face past events, to identify my emotions and thoughts about them, and vice versa, and to examine how they determined my present behavior. In order to change non-helpful or obstructive thinking, emotional reactions, distress, and non-constructive behavior. It appeared to be a profound process of transforming and releasing attachments. I have learned to practice how to remain ‘unaffected’. By observing, receiving, letting go … and then acting.

This remaining ‘unaffected’ has to do with a feeling of being rooted in such a way that you can keep your inner peace.  It doesn’t mean that you hide, avoid, or suppress your emotions, thoughts, or opinions. You just don’t let them influence your behavior.

Rooted in many ways

My life long learning made me feel at ease with the spiral of dynamics called life.

The lessons taught me to let go at deep levels and to regain a kind of primal trust. This is a deeply felt trust in myself that makes me realize how life itself is carried within the flow of life. It feels like being entrusted with life. 

I have learned to trust the process. Even though I cannot oversee the (personal) process, I have come to trust that the process is doing its job and finding its way. The key here is to let go of the need to be in control and to keep everything under control. By becoming more mindful, it became easier for me to see through the force of control and to shift my attention to inner mindfulness and to listening to the different signals and voices of my body.

The more I pay attention to this, the easier it is for me to direct my energy in the right direction without losing myself. The gift is that I can stay rooted in my inner peace and centeredness.

For me, this ability to stay rooted is true empowerment. My inner growth path has inspired me to indicate some pointers for the process of developing your personal compass. Those you find on this website. 

Yael van Assendelft,

contact me.

Photo Credits : Unsplash, Ada V., Ellen R., Loes K., Pixabay, Yael;
Graphics : C. de Vries
With special thanks to Han Buwalda for his content translation support.


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